You know . . .

One of the things I like to do when I get up in the morning is make coffee.

But, before you make the coffee, make sure that like two or three years before you put one of those masks in the freezer, you know, the kind that soothe your head?

Yeah, make sure you freeze it for a long time, so it's nice and brittle.

Then, you leave it hanging so that it kind of catches when you open the freezer door.

So after you've had it frozen a couple of years, and is hanging in the door of the freezer open the freezer and reach for something, snagging your hand on the mask, and yanking it out so it lands on the floor and cracks open.

Now, if you've planned properly, you got one of the good ones, the ones filled with little beads. One billion, approximately . . .

Then, make sure that when you pick up the mask, taking care not to spill all the beads that you do in fact, spill all the beads. That part is crucial.

Oh, and make sure they're all perfectly round. Wouldn't want them to all sit in one spot now, would we . . . .

And yeah, the coffee had nothing to do with it. I just like having coffee first thing.